Humour & Satire

A chance encounter led to a dating contract… with a mafia boss.

I was desperate and needed a pretend boyfriend.

Of all the people in the city, I collided with the ruthless millionaire, Carlo D’Angelo.
His heart is as cold as ice, but he’s so darn hot, I’m surprised it hasn’t melted.

When mistaken for my imaginary beau, I just went with it, and to my surprise…
…he played along.

It turns out he has an agenda of his own, and we needed to play by three simple rules:

• Get to know each other so we’re never caught off guard,
• Make a few public appearances together, and…
• Share two kisses.

In the end, he gets a building he’s been trying to buy from my father, and I get to walk away from an arranged marriage.

The plan seemed perfect. We’re total opposites, so romance was never an option.
I save lives, and he… takes them. So, there was no way anything could go wrong.

That is until he started calling me… his.

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Erica arrives in Belfast, not sure what to expect but excited to experience another culture as she is welcomed by her new flatmate, Gemma, with open arms.

The duo take on the colourful city but have a string of bad luck when it comes to dating the locals until Erica meets the mysterious and charismatic Curtis Ward. He is perfect with his Hollywood-esque good looks and ability to make Erica feel like she is the only person in the room.

But that all changes when the handsome Irishman reveals parts of his personality tied to a sinister past. Who is Curtis Ward? And by the time Erica knows the answer, will it be too late?

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From the minds of Douglas Adams (The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy) and Terry Jones (Monty Python) comes Starship Titanic, the hilarious novelization of the third-best adventure game of 1999.

Welcome on board the Starship Titanic.
The Ship that Cannot Possibly Go Wrong.

At the centre of the galaxy, a vast, unknown civilization is preparing for an event of epic proportions: the launch of the greatest, most gorgeous, most technologically advanced spaceship ever built – the Starship Titanic.

An Earthling would see the ship as something really, really big, but rather less provincial onlookers would recognize it as the design of Leovinus, the galaxy’s most renowned architect. Before the launch Leovinus is having one last little look round and begins to find that things just aren’t right: poor workmanship, cybersystems out of control, robots walking into doors. How could this have happened?

The following morning, while the galaxy’s media looks on, the fabulous ship eases away from the construction dock, picks up speed, sways a little, wobbles a bit, veers wildly and, just before it can do untold damage to everything around it, appears to undergo SMEF (Spontaneous Massive Existence Failure). In just ten seconds, the whole stupendous enterprise is over. And our story has just begun . . .

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Are happy-ever-afters made in Manhattan? Find out in this gorgeous novel, perfect for cold winter nights…

Once upon a time an English girl went to New York to live out her very own fairytale…

Florist Rosie Duncan’s life couldn’t be better, she has a flourishing business on New York’s Upper West Side and fantastic friends. Moving to Manhattan to escape her heartbreak was the best decision she ever made.

For the past six years Rosie has kept her heart under lock and key – despite the protests of her inner circle.

But then, a blossoming friendship with publishing hot-shot Nate thaws her resolve, sparking a blizzard of emotions. Meanwhile, her brother arrives in the Big Apple, hiding a secret – and she is forced to confront questions she has long been trying to ignore…

Can Rosie write her own happily ever after? Or is she destined to be unlucky in love…?

A sparkling romantic comedy, perfect for fans of Lindsey Kelk, Josie Silver and Sophie Kinsella.

Previously published in 2009

Readers ADORE Fairytale of New York:

‘This book SPARKLES! Unlike anything I’ve ever read. I loved it.’ Reader Review, ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

‘If you want a story that is uplifting and engaging, you MUST read this!!!!’ Reader Review, ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

‘Fabulously written romance that makes you believe fairy tales really do come true.’ Reader Review, ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

‘A delightful romantic tale that will put a smile on your face.’ Reader Review, ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

‘This is definitely one for all the hopeless romantics out there!!’ Reader Review, ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

‘Curl up with a cuppa and some chocolate and totally indulge yourself in this romance. Totally super!’ Reader Review, ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

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‘Made me laugh while punching me in the gut. Loved this book’ AISLING BEA

‘This is the greatest. You’ll cry and laugh. I read it though the night. And I never, ever avoid sleep’ CLAUDIA WINKLEMAN

‘I award it 13/10 on my QWJ scale (stands for Queasy With Jealousy that I didn’t write it)’ MARIAN KEYES

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Every relationship has one beginning.
This one has two endings.

Andy loves Jen. Jen loved Andy.
And he can’t work out why she stopped.

Now he is. . .
1. Without a home
2. Waiting for his stand-up career to take off
3. Wondering why everyone else around him seems to have grown up while he wasn’t looking

Set adrift on the sea of heartbreak at a time when everything he thought he knew about women, and flat-sharing, and his friendships has transformed beyond recognition, Andy clings to the idea of solving the puzzle of their broken relationship. Because if he can find the answer to that, then maybe Jen can find her way back to him.

Andy still has a lot to learn, not least his ex-girlfriend’s side of the story.

From the bestselling author of Ghosts and Everything I Know About Love: a sharply funny, beautifully observed and exquisitely relatable story of heartbreak and friendship, and how to survive both.

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This bumper offering of three contemporary novels reveals how criminality flourishes when driven by greed, particularly when nobody has the courage to report wrongdoing.

1. The Whistleblower Affair: Exposing Immorality within boardrooms

A major British bank is in trouble. Investors and account-holders alike are in peril. The rot is embedded at board level. Step forward a highly paid employee so infuriated by his director’s behaviour that he links up with a journalist to expose the criminality involved.

Few anticipate the ferocious worldwide response to the news that much is amiss within this bank; certainly not the journalist, or the whistleblower. Within hours both are put under pressure, from surprising quarters.

Venturing into this field of unbridled greed and avarice, Jonathan Veale, in his wry manner, exposes the criminal behaviour of millionaire bank directors too busy feathering their own nests to deal with complaints about the dreadful services offered to account holders, if any can be found at all in some areas by!

This insightful novel pulls few punches as it denounces these overpaid, rapacious people while informing and entertaining in equal measure.

2. A Chateau To Die For: A Lothario Hell-bent On A Bargain

Property bargains excite Brits contemplating a new life abroad, and French estate agents welcome these expat hopefuls with open arms.

‘Too good to be true,’ is not a concept that bothers dreamers, especially those who have had one too many cognacs and already sold their overpriced homes in Britain for what they regard as the lottery win of a lifetime.

In this diverting story, expat chateau-owners are threatened by an amoral chancer who befriends lonely women anxious to believe they have at last met ‘the right man’. Stryker Upshott’s thoughts are elsewhere, however. He plans to acquire the chateau at a knockdown price as the couple find themselves temporarily stuck for cash. He’s in for a shock. Women, too, can play it rough, and one is briefed to do just that.

And then a Mafia connection surfaces, encouraging both greedy and romantic aspirations to take off in new and unexpected directions.

3. Katie Turns To Crime: Comeuppance for an Actress?

And finally, a female of the species takes centre stage, many of whom have struggled valiantly in the first two novels while, as usual, well meaning men make fools of themselves.

Diamond dealing in Amsterdam, money laundering with a maverick Sicilian in Ibiza, and all the while neglecting her beloved cats . . . what on earth possessed this young now widowed actress to leave her cottage in deepest France and move into circles that would give most of us nightmares?

A few years earlier, Katie Maltravers had undertaken one short role, to help out a friend. Her performance, a real life one, was spectacularly profitable, and the windfall has prompted her to seek further wealth. Soon, nothing is ‘beyond the pale’. Crime awaits, as do complications, romantic and legal. One can only hope Katie eventually sees sense, and repents?

A fitting novel to complete this series of entertaining stories about all too human beings. Of course, we would never behave so inappropriately . . .

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‘Romantic, funny, sweet and sexy’ MARIAN KEYES

‘The funny, clever, deeply romantic, sinfully sexy, devastatingly heartbreaking, perfectly uplifting book of your dreams’ CRESSIDA MCLAUGHLIN

‘A very swoony, sexy, warm read’ CESCA MAJOR

Is he too good to be true?

Meet Theo. Handsome, sexy, funny. kind. And he can cook.

He’s literally the man of Esme’s dreams. But Esme’s sensible enough to know that you can’t just manifest your perfect boyfriend then have him turn up on your doorstep.

Or can you?

All your favourite authors love SARRA MANNING!

‘A VERY special book. GORGEOUS, real believable and BEAUTIFUL’ – Marian Keyes

‘Wonderful – romantic, sexy, moving and impossible to put down’ – Louise O’Neill

‘Sexy, heartfelt, funny and fresh’ – Laura Jane Williams

‘Epically romantic yet utterly relatable’ – Holly Miller

‘Beautiful’ – Lindsey Kelk

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What happens when your past meets your present?

Luca is used to being ‘the single one’ – which is partly why she dreaded going to the wedding of an old university friend. Surrounded by faces she hasn’t seen in 10 years, Luca can feel herself being sucked back into the immature, decade-old gossip that no one seems to have forgotten.

But when Tom walks in, Luca’s heart stops. He was her ‘almost boyfriend’, and she had been completely swept off her feet by him… but he’s currently standing next to the girl he broke her heart with at a party all those years ago.

As the evening draws on and the champagne continues to flow, it’s clear that Tom can’t take his eyes off her. Will Luca’s luck in love finally take a turn?
 
The laugh-out-loud new novel from bestseller Portia Macintosh, perfect for fans of Sophie Ranald and Mhairi MacFarlane!

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Mamma Mia meets Bridesmaids in a laugh-out-loud, life affirming comedy

‘An absolute winner’ Celia Anderson

‘No-one depicts family life with more humour and wisdom than Tracy Bloom’ Katie Fforde

‘You will absolutely love Tracy Bloom… Heartfelt and wonderful’ Miranda Dickinson

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One weekend, one bride-to-be, what could possibly go wrong…

All Shelley wanted on her hen weekend was to enjoy three days of sun, sea and sangria. But instead of being surrounded by the A-team of her closest friends, she somehow ends up with a Golden Girls-meets-the-Spice Girls B-list that includes her mother, a rebellious teenager, and a best mate ‘on the verge’.

The squabbling starts at the airport, and on arrival in Spain, Shelley barely has time to unpack her suitcase before getting an unwanted text ̶ one that throws her wedding into doubt.

Shelley has got a BIG decision to make, but her unruly medley of nearest and dearest seem determined to confuse matters with their own problems.

Have they got what it takes to get her through the most important weekend of her life?

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‘A warm-hearted, wise and wickedly funny slice of family life’ Alex Brown

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