When You Lose It: Two voices. One true story. A mother and daughter on the edge. ‘A very important subject’ – ITV’s This Morning
£8.70£9.50 (-8%)
‘An extraordinary and important book. Read it immediately’ Claudia Winkleman
‘Superbly written, this deeply moving book underlines how truly precious mother-daughter relationships are, and never more so than in those teenage years’ Gloria Hunniford
‘Read this book. Then talk to your sons. It is essential reading’ Jamie Theakston
A gripping memoir of two battling narratives and a mother-daughter relationship stretched to its absolute limits.
Roxy was 13 years old when she was coerced then blackmailed into sending explicit photos, which were spread around her school. The shame led to self-loathing. The blame led to a psychotic breakdown. Roxy started hearing voices. Then she started seeing things…
What happens when your teenager starts to lose it, and then you lose each other? What happens when you can’t tell your mother you desperately need help? And how can a family move past a devastating mental health crisis?
When You Lose It is a brutally honest true story, written from two perspectives, of consent, coercion and shattering consequences.
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Additional information
| Publisher | Welbeck (28 Sept. 2023) |
|---|---|
| Language | English |
| Paperback | 352 pages |
| ISBN-10 | 1802792198 |
| ISBN-13 | 978-1802792195 |
| Dimensions | 19.8 x 2.9 x 12.9 cm |
by CBK
Beautifully written by Gay and Roxy this is a brave, raw, and remarkable story of a family in crisis, told through the often different perspectives of mother and daughter. Heart-breaking to read but impossible to put down, the bravery of Gay and Roxy in sharing this story so honestly with the world is incredible. Through Roxy’s intelligent and eloquent writing of her own experience, the book gives the reader a real insight into the challenges of the teenage world, how easy it is for blame to be placed on the real victim and the devastating consequences. Gay’s compelling writing paints a vivid and heart-breaking picture of the struggle to understand what is happening to her daughter and the fight to get the right help. It is essential reading for parents, and young adults and will without a doubt help other families who find themselves facing similar challenges.
by Amazon Customer
I couldn’t put this down, and it made me re-evaluate my relationships with my own daughters.
It’s an incredible, raw, honest and heart-breaking book about a teenager/parental journey from both the mother and daughter’s perspective. It showed me with incredible clarity how we must all learn to better communicate, navigate and support our children in the digital age when faced with an absolute lack of accessible guidance in the community.
It made me reflect on how I must ask more questions, and try to work together to arm my family against mounting online and social media pressures that can lead to unbelievable exploitation from within children’s own peer groups, sadly capable of destroying valuable young lives.
I’m so grateful to read of these experiences, both sad and positive, so thank you for writing this. It ultimately filled me with great hope as to how to manage my relationships with my own girls moving forwards.
by Meech H
After seeing Gay and Roxy on BBC Breakfast I was intrigued. This book moved me, not the type of book I would normally read but I really couldn’t put it down. It was so honest and brave to put this experience out there for the world to see. I appreciate it.
I have a 6yr old son and when the time is right I will be teaching him about respect for himself and others, also about accountability and ownership, but more so, to be kind.
by Amazon Customer
This is such an important story of the authors’ journey through the teenage years of an intelligent, sensitive girl who just wants to be liked, fit in and enjoy her life, but is derailed by an incident which snowballs into a living nightmare for her and her family. Honest and raw, it demands changes and brings hope. A brave book, which is testament to the possibility of a human being to heal from the worst of experiences, and the power of a mother’s love.
by Iona
I saw you on the BBC, your bravery and strength were unbelievable. Your emotions etched for all to see. When the interview ended I bought your book on kindle and have read it in less than 24 hours. It is heartbreaking, raw and truthful. It is a book everyone should read whether teenager, parent, friend or family – it will resonate with everyone as they reflect on their childhood, the gulf between parents and teens (due to the infiltration of technology) and look at their relationships with friends and family. You are all amazing and this book will be gifted many times – I’ve already bought my third and your strength and openness will be the Zizzi many people need in their lives right now.
by Hgffffff
This is an amazing book that all parents and teenagers should read.
A mother and her teenage daughter each give their own accounts of the daughter’s sexual exploitation at the hands of older boys at school and her subsequent mental health breakdown. Their dual and duelling narratives are beautifully written and elegantly cross-cut to create a propulsive, suspenseful and dramatic account of a family in crisis.
As an exposé of the broken working models in our schools and mental health services, the book is both shocking and timely. What makes it extraordinary, though, rather than merely admirable, is its red-raw emotional power. Both women write with rare candour and courage about deeply felt experiences of shame, guilt, rage, and madness. The portrait that emerges of their own relationship, in all its contradictions and complexities, is immensely powerful and moving. A must read.
by Larkin Armstrong
I could not put the book down! It features both Gay’s and Roxy’s perspectives and I was curious as to what the format of the book would be and I think it is structured perfectly. I love that every single event is told through both narrator’s eyes, it gives the reader a detailed, heartbreaking but needed understanding of what this family is going through. This book will genuinely help and change people, and I truly believe everybody needs to and hope everybody does read it. It will help you, it will help you help others. Essentially, it will help! Parents, teenagers, anyone – you need to read this, not just because it is amazingly written and a superb book, but because it quite literally is impactful enough to completely change (and better) your outlook on life and mental illness itself. It is Brilliant, Upsetting, heartfelt and REAL.
by S. Botfield
I was totally gripped by this read, I struggled to put it down. Having a teenage daughter it Is frightening to know how easily this happens. I was angered by the suffering this poor family had to go through, largely caused by those who were supposed to be helping. I am so pleased they have come out the other side stronger together and bringing awareness by bravely telling their story. A must read for those with sons.